drinkupbaby
happiness, you're so untrue. i can't stand the sight of you.
been a long time, been a long time....
yeah so i haven't written in this thing in forever for a reason....because some people are rude for no reason. they think they have a reason, but they don't. and i'd like to take them down a peg or two and let them know some shit secretly going on in their life. but whatever...keep thinking you're happy and keep thinking you two will get married or some weird shit like that. he has other plans and he does things you don't even know about....i feel sorry for you. but not really because you're a bitch to me for no reason. i've been nothing but nice to you and you stick your nose up in the air at me. screw that.
yesterday i met marshall and steve at the mall in the parking lot and marshall gave me some mushrooms. i was supposed to hang with marsh, chad, and steve on friday night and eat some mushrooms with them, but apparently they ate them all. but whatever...because i got some yesterday. anyways....then i went back to my apartment and i ate them...they tasted kinda shitty. but yeah so i text marshall to tell him i ate them and then i go pick him up and we drive around and end up going to quarry hill.
on this trip i think i smoked like a whole pack of cigarettes..not sure why. it took us like 2 hours to find this one place with the rocks. it was fucking weird because i kept hearing all these sounds. so anyways.. we get to the rock cliffs and use my empty pop can and smoke some dank...so now we're really high. and then i laid down on the rocks and watched the sky. it was so weird i can't even explain what was going on. but i remember seeing the moon blasting off like a rocketship. and it smiled and winked at me, and then did a dance in the sky. fucking crazy... i know.
so we heard some people coming and we got up off the rocks and left. we never did see actual people but we heard them i think. it was almost dark when we left and then i drove him home and went back to my apartment. ofcourse corey and chris knew i was stoned beyond belief and they were pissed off...mostly just corey. i said oh well and gathered my shit and went home because i didnt want to stay at my apartment when my roommates are in a bad mood. so i stopped at the gas station on the way home to get some ice cream and chips because i was really hungy. this guy in line behind me says "nice shirt!" because i'm wearing my alkaline trio sweatshirt. and i say thanks. then he says "wait check this out, i just got it done" and it's the alkaline trio heart and skull...tattooed on his inner calf. it was freaking sweet. i said later mannnn and drove home.
my mom knew i was stoned to shit and she laughed her ass off at me. my dad prolly knew too... how could he not? haha. my mom was pissed i didnt save her anything, isnt that funny? yeah i laughed. i talked with my mom for a long time, probably talked nonsense. at like 1:30 am she finally went upstairs to go to bed and i tried to sleep. but i am still too stoned. and i see my dad's face (who has been dead for 10 years) next to mine and he asks me how i am doing without him. i tell him not very good. he looks just like he did 10 years ago when he was alive. but he tells me that he isnt very happy that im not happy. he said that i dont want to end up like him and die too young. i say that im sorry but i miss him a lot. and then his face kisses my cheek and just like that... it is gone.
i don't fall asleep until 7 am...so obviously i don't go to school. i got some random text message from marshall at like 2 am about jerking off and i remember getting confused. probably because he was still stoned as well. i never had a trip like that in my life and it was great. i've never seen the sky look so beautiful as it did last night....or the trees look as green. i loved it.
yesterday i met marshall and steve at the mall in the parking lot and marshall gave me some mushrooms. i was supposed to hang with marsh, chad, and steve on friday night and eat some mushrooms with them, but apparently they ate them all. but whatever...because i got some yesterday. anyways....then i went back to my apartment and i ate them...they tasted kinda shitty. but yeah so i text marshall to tell him i ate them and then i go pick him up and we drive around and end up going to quarry hill.
on this trip i think i smoked like a whole pack of cigarettes..not sure why. it took us like 2 hours to find this one place with the rocks. it was fucking weird because i kept hearing all these sounds. so anyways.. we get to the rock cliffs and use my empty pop can and smoke some dank...so now we're really high. and then i laid down on the rocks and watched the sky. it was so weird i can't even explain what was going on. but i remember seeing the moon blasting off like a rocketship. and it smiled and winked at me, and then did a dance in the sky. fucking crazy... i know.
so we heard some people coming and we got up off the rocks and left. we never did see actual people but we heard them i think. it was almost dark when we left and then i drove him home and went back to my apartment. ofcourse corey and chris knew i was stoned beyond belief and they were pissed off...mostly just corey. i said oh well and gathered my shit and went home because i didnt want to stay at my apartment when my roommates are in a bad mood. so i stopped at the gas station on the way home to get some ice cream and chips because i was really hungy. this guy in line behind me says "nice shirt!" because i'm wearing my alkaline trio sweatshirt. and i say thanks. then he says "wait check this out, i just got it done" and it's the alkaline trio heart and skull...tattooed on his inner calf. it was freaking sweet. i said later mannnn and drove home.
my mom knew i was stoned to shit and she laughed her ass off at me. my dad prolly knew too... how could he not? haha. my mom was pissed i didnt save her anything, isnt that funny? yeah i laughed. i talked with my mom for a long time, probably talked nonsense. at like 1:30 am she finally went upstairs to go to bed and i tried to sleep. but i am still too stoned. and i see my dad's face (who has been dead for 10 years) next to mine and he asks me how i am doing without him. i tell him not very good. he looks just like he did 10 years ago when he was alive. but he tells me that he isnt very happy that im not happy. he said that i dont want to end up like him and die too young. i say that im sorry but i miss him a lot. and then his face kisses my cheek and just like that... it is gone.
i don't fall asleep until 7 am...so obviously i don't go to school. i got some random text message from marshall at like 2 am about jerking off and i remember getting confused. probably because he was still stoned as well. i never had a trip like that in my life and it was great. i've never seen the sky look so beautiful as it did last night....or the trees look as green. i loved it.
everybody knows that you're insane...
You want to know why you feel so hollow?
Because you are.
You're missing out?
Well if you say so,
then you're missing out.
Everybody knows that you're insane
You want to know just how long,
you can hide from what you are?
Not very long.
I have been lost,
down every road I follow out in the dark,
on my way home.
But I feel nothing,
am I better yet?
Everybody knows that you're insane.
Because you are.
You're missing out?
Well if you say so,
then you're missing out.
Everybody knows that you're insane
You want to know just how long,
you can hide from what you are?
Not very long.
I have been lost,
down every road I follow out in the dark,
on my way home.
But I feel nothing,
am I better yet?
Everybody knows that you're insane.
burn the witch, burn to ash & stone...
bleep bloop bleep i hate petty bullshit. i hate when people get mad at me, but it's something i've learned to deal with. marshall is done with me i guess because i basically didn't spend time with him over spring break but instead with my friends. oh well i guess. if that is something to get mad and jealous over..and break up over..then god, i don't know. it seems extremely petty to me.
i love my friends more than this big fat world, especially Stacy because that girl has been there for me this year like no one could ever imagine. she and i hung out everyday and it was fun. she and i got tattoos thursday, too and they're pretty hot if i do say so myself. she got a tiny heart on her bum and i got a shamrock on the back of my neck, which is now scabbing and peeling, and it doesn't look very good at the moment.
i was supposed to go to the fall out boy concert tonite but leave it to me to be sick with strep throat. yep i went to the ER after school and yes this little lady has strep. so my mom wouldn't let me go to the concert tonite. it was probably a good idea because i need to save my strength and health for the sweet ass concert tomorrow night.....QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE. yesssss, i am so fucking excited for that. they're one of my favorite bands for sure. i'm going with chops & corey. corey bought his ticket from ebay tonite for 20 bucks because ticketmaster sold out and the guy is going to meet us at the quest tomorrow to give corey the ticket..hopefully the guy shows up, haha or else corey is screwed.
i just got back from walking for 2 hours with Stacy...it was good exercise, despite the blisters on my feet. yeah i thought i'd be cool and wear my birks while we walked for 8 miles... not the best choice in foot wear. it's so nice to have a friend like Stacy where you can walk for 2 hours and talk about anything and everything and not get bored with each other's company.
well that's all for now folks...goodnite.
i love my friends more than this big fat world, especially Stacy because that girl has been there for me this year like no one could ever imagine. she and i hung out everyday and it was fun. she and i got tattoos thursday, too and they're pretty hot if i do say so myself. she got a tiny heart on her bum and i got a shamrock on the back of my neck, which is now scabbing and peeling, and it doesn't look very good at the moment.
i was supposed to go to the fall out boy concert tonite but leave it to me to be sick with strep throat. yep i went to the ER after school and yes this little lady has strep. so my mom wouldn't let me go to the concert tonite. it was probably a good idea because i need to save my strength and health for the sweet ass concert tomorrow night.....QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE. yesssss, i am so fucking excited for that. they're one of my favorite bands for sure. i'm going with chops & corey. corey bought his ticket from ebay tonite for 20 bucks because ticketmaster sold out and the guy is going to meet us at the quest tomorrow to give corey the ticket..hopefully the guy shows up, haha or else corey is screwed.
i just got back from walking for 2 hours with Stacy...it was good exercise, despite the blisters on my feet. yeah i thought i'd be cool and wear my birks while we walked for 8 miles... not the best choice in foot wear. it's so nice to have a friend like Stacy where you can walk for 2 hours and talk about anything and everything and not get bored with each other's company.
well that's all for now folks...goodnite.
No bruises - hit me
Yessssssssss
heck yessss. past 2 days have been awesome. first of all last night i went out to dos amigos to eat with everybody and...dun dun dun.... guess who shows up?? COREY! yaaaaay! all the way from Ohio. he moved back secretly yesterday and surprised us all. i was so happy to see him..woot! then last night i slept at chris jacobson's house with him and chris knoepke. 'twas fun because they're a couple of crazy kids.
then yesterday i was looking in the classifieds for jobs and i saw one for Glynner's Pub that is opening soon and wants waitresses and bartenders, etc. so i went there today to fill out an application. when i was done i handed it to the owner and he gave me a weird look after he looked at my application. he was like "hmm...strike. is that your maiden name?" and i said "yesss" and he asked me if i had any relatives in the Spring Valley area and i said "yesss my uncle Matt Strike lives there" and this guys goes "whoa that's my cousin. is your dad Jon Strike?" and i said "yesss" lol. so apparently this guy is my dad's cousin Brad Glynn who i haven't seen since i was like 12 years old. but he remembered me apparently and it going to call me about the waitressing at the Pub... SWEEEET! that just makes me day. i'm sure i'll get the job just because he's my second cousin, hahaha.
tonite i have no idea what i am doing. too many people are wanting to hang out with me...which, trust me, never happens. stacy wants me to go bowling with her and kai, nat, sal, and those people. the guys want me to hang with them. dayna wants me to stay at her house with her & melissa. marsh wants to hang out with me. AAAAH. insanity? yes. because usually i just sit at my home by myself an do nothing. but not tonite.
gottta gooo for now. ta-ta.
then yesterday i was looking in the classifieds for jobs and i saw one for Glynner's Pub that is opening soon and wants waitresses and bartenders, etc. so i went there today to fill out an application. when i was done i handed it to the owner and he gave me a weird look after he looked at my application. he was like "hmm...strike. is that your maiden name?" and i said "yesss" and he asked me if i had any relatives in the Spring Valley area and i said "yesss my uncle Matt Strike lives there" and this guys goes "whoa that's my cousin. is your dad Jon Strike?" and i said "yesss" lol. so apparently this guy is my dad's cousin Brad Glynn who i haven't seen since i was like 12 years old. but he remembered me apparently and it going to call me about the waitressing at the Pub... SWEEEET! that just makes me day. i'm sure i'll get the job just because he's my second cousin, hahaha.
tonite i have no idea what i am doing. too many people are wanting to hang out with me...which, trust me, never happens. stacy wants me to go bowling with her and kai, nat, sal, and those people. the guys want me to hang with them. dayna wants me to stay at her house with her & melissa. marsh wants to hang out with me. AAAAH. insanity? yes. because usually i just sit at my home by myself an do nothing. but not tonite.
gottta gooo for now. ta-ta.
No bruises - hit me
10.12.1956 - 3.22.1995
It's just a matter of time
That we all go away to a better place I'm told
It all sounds well and fine
But without you around I feel nothing but cold
And I now have nothing
But your heartbeat in my head
And a photograph of my traveling friend
And I became nothing when I found you were dead
When I found out I'd never see you again
good god it's been 10 years since i lost you, Dad. i miss you like crazy and i want nothing more than to you see your brilliant face again. i wish it was all a joke, but i don't think it is.
if i didn't spend tonite with marsh to keep my mind preoccupied, i am scared to death of what i may have done to myself. i get so overly depressed on this day every year for the last 10 years. even if i am happy right now, today always sends me over the deep end and gets me more than depressed and suicidal. if i hadn't spent tonite with marsh, god knows what i would have done to myself. i can only guess. i don't think i would be here in this lifetime. and that's a scary thought, but i can't help myself.
i love you, dad.
That we all go away to a better place I'm told
It all sounds well and fine
But without you around I feel nothing but cold
And I now have nothing
But your heartbeat in my head
And a photograph of my traveling friend
And I became nothing when I found you were dead
When I found out I'd never see you again
good god it's been 10 years since i lost you, Dad. i miss you like crazy and i want nothing more than to you see your brilliant face again. i wish it was all a joke, but i don't think it is.
if i didn't spend tonite with marsh to keep my mind preoccupied, i am scared to death of what i may have done to myself. i get so overly depressed on this day every year for the last 10 years. even if i am happy right now, today always sends me over the deep end and gets me more than depressed and suicidal. if i hadn't spent tonite with marsh, god knows what i would have done to myself. i can only guess. i don't think i would be here in this lifetime. and that's a scary thought, but i can't help myself.
i love you, dad.
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